I'm a softaballer!

Yesterday I went to a friend's softball game and had a great time. I literally stole second base and shoved it in my sweatshirt and walked away, until she tackled me and ripped second base. I was emotionally attached to that thing, damn it. Then whenever my friend went to third base, I would walk over and scream, "You went all the way to third base! You ho." I acted so mature, it even surprised me. Sadly, there was a lot of smokin hot guys there , and I was wearing boring jeans and a boring hoodie. If i had a 200 dollars, the talent to run in heels, and foresight, I probably would of worn this:


Also, I was thrown out of the game for "harassing" the players. I made so many friends that day.